When will my reflection show who I am inside?

I just watched a video on YouTube from nearly two years ago called "What If Every Woman Was Beautiful?" It was a social experiment by this boy named Cordero Roman. He found a research article that said only 4% of women worldwide consider themselves to be beautiful. In reaction, he went up to some young women and asked them questions relating to the topic and their responses helped me recognize a big part of this problem. In the video, Cordero tells the women "In your own personal experience is it hard being a beautiful person?" All of the women responded in a shocked state with a loss for words, most of them admitting that they wouldn't consider themselves to be beautiful. This got me thinking. My response to their reaction (which I assume would be most girls reactions) was a theory of why we do this or act this way. It is because growing up women are always told that you are vain if you believe yourself to be beautiful. It is frowned upon to think highly of yourself, which is so messed up, but it's true. This is how we've raised our girls-- to think that being confident and content with yourself is cocky. It's not. There's a difference between those things and I think we forget about that as we get older. It all starts when we're kids; so we should be encouraging our young girls to have faith in themselves, to be confident and courageous. We should teach our daughters that real beauty comes from the inside. If you are a good person with a kind heart, you are beautiful, there's nothing more to it. Beauty is uniqueness; it is authenticity. I resonate with this whole schpiel very deeply. My whole life, people in my life have judged me for looking in the mirror. My entire adolescent life I was told that I was vain for looking at myself in the mirror. I've never felt that I was vain and it's always been very painful and triggering to hear that. I'm not over exaggerating. It makes me feel so low. If you know me, you know who I am, you know I'm a good person who loves people and has so much compassion and empathy towards others. Why would I care so much about myself? Only about myself? It honestly makes no sense. People have engrained in my head that I shouldn't be confident in the way that I look according to what they scold me about (looking at my reflection). It definitely has effected my life and made me insecure about what others think of me. So when people tell me "Oh don't care about what others think". I've spent my whole life worrying, it's not going to go away, it's hard. So let me know your ideas on this topic or if you've ever felt this way. Until next time xx Mad